Strong 800(Day 22 of 30)

All of my life experiences put together could surely have converged to break me, heart and soul. But I am a strong woman, and I am fortunate for it.

If I were a religious person, I might believe the words “God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength but with your testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it.” I’ve never read the bible, though, and I only have a vague idea of who Paul was. For that and some other reasons, God quotes are not my thing. Buddha is more my speed:

He is able who thinks he is able.

I am strong, not because God thinks so. I am strong because I think so. I feel that so much more deeply. I am responsible for who and what I am. And I choose strong.

I absolutely have my weak moments. I’ve stumbled and fallen. I doubt myself all the time, but ultimately I know that I will face any challenge I come to and find a way to come away from it whole. Plus, hopefully, I’ll come out stronger and wiser in the mix.

It’s interesting, I think, that this time in history, we are made to believe that strength should be a constant. As though, no matter what we face we must prevail. From the moment a life trial begins, it’s already on the way to its end because we are/must be just that strong. It’s a dangerous construct, that one is.

I cannot be strong 100 percent of the time. I am not a robot. I am a living, malleable, emotional human being. With that comes the fact that I will have moments of strength equally with moments of weakness. The part that matters is who I become in the end.

I may be weak today or tomorrow, or for all of next month, but ultimately I must become stronger. Why is that? Because I choose it. And I have the power to make it so.

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